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Tuesday, January 12, 2010


After visiting several blogs, I found that I liked the ones that had some sort of weekly posting structure to them. So I'm going to try to start something like that. Starting today with Reflection Tuesdays.

A conversation today with my brother revealed a matter that my conscious mind was unaware of. I say my "conscious" mind because unconsciously, I was more than aware.

     The moment you walk through the doors of high school, you stop learning lessons from a book.
     Instead, you learn more useful things.
     For example, how to appear to being paying attention when really thinking about how to beat the next level on Call of Duty, what to blog about that night, or why men and flick their tongues faster than women. Or, how to break up the homework so that everyone in the class only has to answer one of the questions and copies the rest. And, my specialty, how to B.S. and essay and get the highest grade in the class without actually knowing what your talking about.
     But you don't learn all this in one year. So I've broken it down into a short lesson plan for each year.

Freshman Year
     1. How To Access Your Locker
The combination is the easy part. Getting passed the hulking, broad- shouldered, mo- hawked football player to reach your lock and be safely out of the way of stampeding upperclassmen, becomes an acrobatic feat. Especially for anyone under 5'5".
     2. Understanding Ebonics
Depending on where you're school is, this is an important lesson to learn quickly. Your teacher will most likely be some 6 foot three hundred pound female. Ebonics are no longer partial to race or upbringing...
     3. Keeping A Low Profile
This becomes basic survival thats applied throughout high school. The benefits of learning this lesson well include escaping the attentions of your psycho chemistry teacher and that senior that thinks he's a riot.
     4. Navigating the Halls
It seems an easy task. But its the most violent game of human pinball in existence. Identifying which bumpers have negative and positive connotations is part of the skill.
     5. Appearing to Care
Another basic talent that's applicable in all areas of life. Mastering this skill will save you from the teacher's sick games of picking the student who seems to be paying the least attention.

It appears that I shall have to save Sophomore lessons for next week :]


  1. Colleen your a RIOT!!!! and every word of this is SOOOO true! Haha I want you to write my Biography!

  2. haha. Perhaps I shall. But the middle section would consist of 1 page that said "The Lost Years" :D


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